Thursday, August 19, 2010

Get Real

The New Slate of Promising Reality-TV Shows

Rape House – Five college coeds are sequestered under one roof for a month, denied modern amenities, such as cell phones, the internet, or TV. The twist ~ one is a serial campus rapist. Can alliances help you now? Dehumanizing violence followed by comic vigilante justice will ensue.

So You Think You Can Bake? Kitchen shut-ins from across the land compete for the honor of the next great American pastry chef. Celebrity judges from IHOP, Friendly’s and House of Pies will cast a discerning eye over their flaky creations.

Last Plumber Standing – A fleet of America’s best pipe-men tackle a slate of ever-more- complex plumbing nightmares, including an 18th century Druid castle. Who will be left high and dry when this shit settles?

Suicide Watch – Closed circuit surveillance technology places us directly in the cell of an accused criminal, placed on that most grave status as a danger to his or her-self. Stare 24-7 along with the trained authorities to see if you can spot that hidden shoelace!

America’s Got Problems – From white supremacists to cult-mavens to amputee-fetish enthusiasts, everyone gets their 15 minutes in this new showcase musical-variety competition. Who will make it all the way to Vegas and into our nation’s heart?