(Even More!) Things to Do Last Week

(August Ed., Condensed from the Pages of Time’s Up NY)
Here’s just a few of the many city happenings to miss last week ~

‘Mamet in The Park’ (Every Weekend) Fans will line up early (& occasionally brawl) to gain entry to this free (& blue) city tradition. This year’s gritty al fresco production of ‘American Buffalo’ brings the combined talents of Zach Braff, Woody Harrelson and the kid from ‘Two &1/2 Men.’ The whole family is welcome, but don’t worry - earmuffs will be provided for the little ones as protection from flying F-words. (Though they gotta know that shit by now- it’s the goddam city!)

Squatter Museum & Living History Tour (Tues, Thurs) Last remaining 1980s East Village anarcho-punk communal squatter Duncan ‘Pullen’ Teith leads you on a tour of ‘his’ Tompkins Square Park, including the site of his bulldozed lean-to and the condemned tenement he and his old lady shot up in (now a luxury condo). Meet at the Pinkberry Frozen Yogurt near 7th St. & Ave A.

A Conversation w/ Andrew “Dice” Clay @ Yeshiva Institute (Flushing, Thurs) Raunchy Hebrew comic legend The “Dice-Man” (nee Andrew Silverstein) sits down for a probing discussion about his new memoir, What’chu Lookin’ At, Jew-Boy? (A Reflection) Note: Requests for Andrew’s ‘schtick’ will not be honored, as the conversation will focus on his book only. (Although ya might get one or two if yer lucky, if you know what I mean - Boom!)

Nanny Wars (Sat)- Third Avenue north of 72nd St. will close to traffic for this lively event, in which Upper East Side nannies compete in events ranging from the Duane Reade Pharmacy Relay, to the Toys ‘R Us Elevator Cram to the Stouffer’s Wide Load Stroller 100k. Caribbean treats will be served, and the winner will go on to challenge the champion of the Park Slope Regionals.

‘Time’s Up’s ‘Go Postal!’ Speed-Dating (Sun) With snail-mail fast becoming a cultural artifact and the USPS threatening to go belly-up, why not come out for a night of potential romance to benefit your local branch? The lines move quicker, too! When the lights flash, aspiring singles rotate to greet their next potential match at assigned service windows, hoping for an express delivery - of love. It’s the best ‘Flat-rate’ date in town.
($15 w/one comp. beverage, Canal Street branch)

MORE Things to Do Last Week!

MORE Things to Do Last Week!
(Condensed from the pgs of Time's Up NY)

MON
Movies in the MP @ Prime Meats
Come on down to take in a flick at sunset, projected on the blank yet blood-stained wall of the Prime Meats slaughterhouse in the industrial-chic meat-packing district. This week: Blooper Night! Enjoy a parade of blooper reels from your favorite cosmopolitan girls in ‘SATC,’ perhaps catching a glimpse of Miranda’s penis. You go, girlfriends.
Next week: ‘Men in Black’ bloopers.

TUES
John Cage Karaoke @ The Sketch-Pad
Aspiring avant-amateurs will hone their rendition of the legendary experimental composer’s seminal piece, ’12 Minutes of Silence,’ on stage before an audience of their adoring peers. The Sketch-Pad is a DIY venue located in that teetering warehouse down by the canal- follow toxic scent from nearby White Castle.

WED
Free Mystery Concert @ The Crochet Concern
Alright so it’s actually red-hot Canadian super-group collective Wolf! Wolf? Wolves?! who are gracing our burg at this very special free show. RSVP required last Thursday, admission not guaranteed or encouraged. See you there!

THURS
Sorrell Booke Memorial Lecture @ Museum of Disposable Visual Culture
Actor Pat Harrington, TV’s ‘Snyder’ from ‘One Day at a Time,’ addresses the vanishing role of the urban building superintendent in today’s modern sit-com landscape, and whether he is actually a licensed plumber.

FRI
Bushwick Ice Follies Present: ‘Soul On Ice: The Musical,’ based on the prison memoirs of radical Black Panther liberationist leader Eldridge Cleaver, and featuring a dynamic period soundtrack. It’s a Revolution – on ice!

Plus ~ 37 other simultaneous free summer events aimed at your youthful, hip demographic!

Things To Do Last Week - OBSOLETE SHEET

Things To Do Last Week---
THE OBSOLETE SHEET CALENDAR
(condensed from the pgs of TIME’S UP NY)

WED
‘STATUS’ Opening @ You Are Not Acknowledged Gallery
(Revolving Location)

‘STATUS: Riddle, Enigma and Haiku in the Fleeting Landscape of Social Networking Status Updates’ will celebrate with opening virtual reception.
Note: In order to attend, visitors MUST register as Lifetime Followers’ of YANA Gallery on Twitter, and compulsively recheck status updates for location btw hours of 7:15 and 9:15 pm.

FRI
That Band From New Zealand @ Blah-Space

That Hugely Influential Band from New Zealand whose name you can’t remember (the one with the terminally ill drummer) will perform their one, and possibly last US gig at the intimate Blah-Space. Forged visa problems forced the band to scrap previous tour plans this year. All proceeds will go toward the drummer’s pointless medical bills and The Fight Against Global Malaise.

SUN
Open-Air Flea / Singles Meet n’ Greet @ Sewage Treatment Tower Park

Vintage sparks (and scents) will fly as young singles stroll the grounds of the recently converted green-space with over 500 vendors at hand. Darting eyes will meet as they haggle over that one ‘special score,’ and then they’ll go have babies. Cupcakes will be served.


OOPS—You Missed it! Better Luck Next Week!